Yesterday morning while at my friend Jennie's house I heard that familiar ring on my cell phone, "Electric Avenue" by Eddie Grant. All of our adoption agency phone numbers have been assigned the "Electric Avenue" ring, so my heart jumped when I heard it. A new birthmother, who we'll call Sh, saw our profile and liked us. She wanted to talk to us on the phone.
This morning at 8am the phone call was set to take place. The caseworker called us; I conferenced in Kent, and she conferenced in Sh. It's amazing how you can be filled with love for someone you've never met before, but that's how adoption is. Sh and I (with Kent listening on at work) had a great conversation. She talked about how she knew this angel baby of hers was meant to bless a family, and I assured her that we would love her and that our home would be filled with song, laughter and love. Turns out Sh and I both grew up in New York, her in the city and me upstate. Sh loves to sing and dance; in fact, the pictures of us singing karaoke at our wedding caught her attention she said. She also said that the fact that we already had an African American child touched her heart.
It's so hard to describe what these conversations are like with a woman who knows she is giving you a part of herself and the greatest gift any person could ever give. There is a sense of mutual love almost immediately because we know the sacrifice she's making, and she knows (and hopes) that you will love her child and provide him/her with a happy life. It's truly indescribable.
So, Sh is having a baby girl at the end of July. A girl!!! I'm excited to get out all of my baby girl things and to redecorate the nursery to make it more "girlish" as Bekah says. Actually, Bekah uses that word in the context of NOT wanting to wear something, "No! That's too girlish!" But I digress... we are excited and very happy. And, yes, we are nervous too after our previous 2 experiences, but a good friend reminded me yesterday, "Try not to be too guarded. Remember heartache is better than regret." All too true, and I've decided that I will allow myself to fall in love all over again with another baby and another birthmother knowing that whatever the Lord's will is will come to pass.